Can you trust your story of what happened? The other day, a client said: “I knew that promotion would go to her instead”. And then I listened to a fascinating story of self-denigration. How they had gotten every.single.thing.wrong. And bad luck too. Just the day before, another had said: “I knew that job was the […]
Read MoreThe Difficult Colleague: How Changing Your Interpretation Changes Your Reaction In this article series, I explore how Relationship Friction and Relationship Wisdom shape career satisfaction and progression through apparently innocuous, yet critical, workplace moments. And yet, I seem to be developing a habit of departing from that original plan 🤔 The first departure had me […]
Read MoreThe biggest mistake professionals make is confusing office politics with political behaviour In this article series, I explore how Relationship Friction (RF) and Relationship Wisdom (RW) shape career satisfaction and progression through apparently innocuous, yet critical, workplace moments. Last month, we sidestepped to delve into recognisable signs that RF is slowly wreaking your career. As […]
Read More“So you’re saying, it’s not just me?” Another question I hear too often. And also: “Can you make the ache disappear?” Gut-wrenching 🤛 So many feel isolated in the workplace — even though they are surrounded by people, instant messages, meetings — noise. A lot of attention may even be paid to them — not always of […]
Read More5 Signs Relationship Friction is Stalling Your Career In this article series, I explore how Relationship Friction (RF) and Relationship Wisdom (RW) shape career satisfaction and progression through apparently innocuous, yet critical, workplace moments. A number of you have reached out to discuss how to more precisely recognise RF. This article is therefore a brief […]
Read MorePresence beats stress. It starts in your feet 👣 “Alexandra, I’m so 🤬⚡️🔥💥 🌶️ 🔴✨stressed.” “I can’t think straight”, she added. I’ve heard this many times. People so stressed they don’t believe they can handle their session. Or much of anything else. Caroline was suffering from the usual forms of stress: Information overload: emails, messaging, […]
Read More“It was none of my doing”. My client said it with a heavy sigh. I replied: “Too bad because then it will be none of your fixing.” I invited her to draw a responsibility camembert. When I mention a French cheese, clients find it amusing and fill it out with a little smile. Taking responsibility […]
Read MoreFlight as Relationship Wisdom, not cowardice: in praise of avoidance. When I was 16, philosophy entered my life to feed a hunger I didn’t even know I had: I wanted meaning. Often confused, I also wanted advice: not my parents’, biased, nor my friends’, just as clueless as I. I appreciated philosophy’s variety of […]
Read MoreWhen crisis hits at work, reach for your purple crayon 🖍️💜 Are you in crisis right now? If not, have you ever experienced one and can you remember it? In the book Harold and the Purple Crayon*, a boy escapes catastrophe thanks to a magic crayon. In the grip of calamity, do you wish you […]
Read More“My manager is toxic. Can you really help?” I hear this far too often from prospective clients. Don’t despair: Relationship Wisdom can help even with toxic people 🤛 When it comes to toxic people, very little helps. That’s true. But it’s not nothing. I had three toxic managers over the course of my 24-year career. […]
Read More“You will function better. It might not be at your current workplace though.” This is what I told a prospective client the other day. Three main blocks hinder ambitious professionals from thriving and advancing in their career: 1️⃣ fear – of reputation damage, loss of opportunity, and even rejection/marginalisation 2️⃣ lack of clarity – confusion […]
Read MoreWe obsess over labels when all we really need is presence. My truth: coaching is not a doing thing. It’s a being thing. It’s me with you. I am being me, and I help you be more of you. The other day someone asked me about the difference between coaching and therapy. I get that […]
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