“Alexandra, you’re already out of a job,” an AI creator warned me recently. AI has several PhDs in psychology. As such, it can give you well-meaning advice. It will list relationship skills, explain active listening, and offer tips to resolve conflict. It will write you a long recipe about how to influence. It knows all […]
Read MoreWould you like to know why you’re abandoning your New Year’s resolutions? Did you wince when you read that? If so, it wasn’t the first time, was it? There is no shortage of research and analysis on how quickly we drop our New Year resolutions. Psychologists call it “self-sabotage”: doing what’s harmful and suffering about […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom: The Antidote that Transforms Relationship Friction into Career Momentum There’s a particular kind of professional exhaustion that has nothing to do with workload. It shows up as dread before certain meetings, the weight of unresolved tensions, or that persistent sense that you’re working twice as hard for half the recognition. You deliver excellent […]
Read MoreRelationship Friction: The Hidden Force That Breaks Careers ‘Relationship Friction’ (RF) is one of those concepts people recognize immediately when it is named yet struggle to describe while they are living inside it. Among other things, it shows up as tension in meetings, second-guessing after conversations, resentment that quietly accumulates, or a persistent sense that […]
Read MoreFinally understand why your conversations with Millennials hit a wall. I often coach managers who struggle with their Gen Y / Millennial team members. This classic case of Relationship Friction seems a near-universal pain point in professional life right now. It’s exhausting for everyone. My diagnostic: my clients’s professional whys do not align with their […]
Read MoreHarnessing your anger can help you access your Relationship Wisdom. Anger has a bad rap which I think is underserved. While there is obviously much truth to Ryan Holiday’s statement that there’s “no one stupider than an angry person”, I wish to tell you about how to use anger to combat Relationship Friction. In last […]
Read MoreBeat Relationship Friction by making up a reason not to disengage. When Relationship Friction bites, we typically have one of two immediate, instinctive reactions: Anger or withdrawal. This post focuses on withdrawal—that paralyzing feeling, the instinct to run, to disengage. For example, When an important conversation doesn’t work out, you freeze and become mute. When […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom in practice: taking appropriate responsibility is the hardest step. The other day, I was outlining a customised coaching journey for a prospective client burdened by Relationship Friction. She interrupted me: “It wasn’t my fault.” Until then, she had been smiling. Her body language had been relaxed and open. I saw her visibly tense. […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom in the Age of AI? Here is why it matters now more than ever. The AI debate currently raging misses out on highlighting what AI cannot — in fact won’t be able to — do. And yet, what AI cannot do reveals our structural human advantage. Here is a quote I find particularly […]
Read MoreThe Israeli-Palestinian conflict is the epitome of Relationship Friction I hesitated to post about this: such a loaded and incredibly delicate topic. Let me make it clear: my intention with this post is NOT to make light of this war. My point is this: Relationship Friction is the root cause of conflict. It can take many forms. […]
Read MoreEmployers ask you to manage. You also need to be able to cope. The difference between the two is crucial. Many of my clients face excessive workloads. Incessant demands impossible to plan for. Ever-rising business volumes without the right processes. In response, they are expected to manage. Managing is both cognitive and behavioural. It demands […]
Read MoreIs your team dysfunctional? 5 ways to tell – and what to do about it If you are the manager of a dysfunctional team, There is constant interpersonal drama instead of strategic work. Your team simply cannot deliver Your projects are delayed if not altogether failing. Paradoxically, your team members are individually gifted but their […]
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