Beat Relationship Friction by making up a reason not to disengage. When Relationship Friction bites, we typically have one of two immediate, instinctive reactions: Anger or withdrawal. This post focuses on withdrawal—that paralyzing feeling, the instinct to run, to disengage. For example, When an important conversation doesn’t work out, you freeze and become mute. When […]
Read MoreHow friendship can help you develop your Relationship Wisdom. (I wrote this post to honour my best friend on this week of Thanksgiving in the US. Thank you N.) Often, when I say “Relationship Wisdom”, I get quizzical looks – or eye rolls or stunned looks. Relationship Wisdom is complex but it’s not complicated. After […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom in practice: taking appropriate responsibility is the hardest step. The other day, I was outlining a customised coaching journey for a prospective client burdened by Relationship Friction. She interrupted me: “It wasn’t my fault.” Until then, she had been smiling. Her body language had been relaxed and open. I saw her visibly tense. […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom in the Age of AI? Here is why it matters now more than ever. The AI debate currently raging misses out on highlighting what AI cannot — in fact won’t be able to — do. And yet, what AI cannot do reveals our structural human advantage. Here is a quote I find particularly […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom isn’t as difficult as you think it is. Here is a small tutorial. I recently had a milestone birthday. That day, a saleswoman from a shop I frequent emailed me a birthday greeting. She mentioned my age in a way I found clumsy. Annoyed, I sent just a curt reply. To her credit, she sensed it: […]
Read MoreThe Israeli-Palestinian conflict is the epitome of Relationship Friction I hesitated to post about this: such a loaded and incredibly delicate topic. Let me make it clear: my intention with this post is NOT to make light of this war. My point is this: Relationship Friction is the root cause of conflict. It can take many forms. […]
Read MoreEmployers ask you to manage. You also need to be able to cope. The difference between the two is crucial. Many of my clients face excessive workloads. Incessant demands impossible to plan for. Ever-rising business volumes without the right processes. In response, they are expected to manage. Managing is both cognitive and behavioural. It demands […]
Read MoreIs your team dysfunctional? 5 ways to tell – and what to do about it If you are the manager of a dysfunctional team, There is constant interpersonal drama instead of strategic work. Your team simply cannot deliver Your projects are delayed if not altogether failing. Paradoxically, your team members are individually gifted but their […]
Read MoreHello and welcome to this month’s neuro blog! What did you think of my suggestion back in April to leverage language to influence how you feel? Did you tell yourself you ‘only’ felt your negative emotions – to hasten their passing? – and that you were your positive emotions – to encourage them to linger a bit? This month, […]
Read MoreHello and welcome to this month’s neuro blog! And I promise, no more about paying attention! I appreciate that four articles – fascinating though they were, weren’t they? – on that topic is enough. But before we move on, wasn’t it interesting to see how neuroscience – and notably understanding how our brains process stimuli, including social cues […]
Read MoreHello and welcome to this month’s neuro blog! Last month, we discussed other-awareness and landed on the notion that disagreement – about beliefs, values and behaviours – is more likely to be the norm. I advocated tolerance but also proposed that you put on a metaphorical Detective Columbo’s raincoat (no need for the cigar nor the dishevelled look) and go look for the […]
Read MoreHello and welcome to this month’s neuro blog! And of course: best wishes for happy 2018! In last month’s blog, we discussed the fact that voluntary attention – what we consciously focus on – is the instrument thanks to which we can shape our reality – rather than it being just the result of an interpretative process based […]
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