Harnessing your anger can help you access your Relationship Wisdom. Anger has a bad rap which I think is underserved. While there is obviously much truth to Ryan Holiday’s statement that there’s “no one stupider than an angry person”, I wish to tell you about how to use anger to combat Relationship Friction. In last […]
Read MoreBeat Relationship Friction by making up a reason not to disengage. When Relationship Friction bites, we typically have one of two immediate, instinctive reactions: Anger or withdrawal. This post focuses on withdrawal—that paralyzing feeling, the instinct to run, to disengage. For example, When an important conversation doesn’t work out, you freeze and become mute. When […]
Read MoreHow friendship can help you develop your Relationship Wisdom. (I wrote this post to honour my best friend on this week of Thanksgiving in the US. Thank you N.) Often, when I say “Relationship Wisdom”, I get quizzical looks – or eye rolls or stunned looks. Relationship Wisdom is complex but it’s not complicated. After […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom in practice: taking appropriate responsibility is the hardest step. The other day, I was outlining a customised coaching journey for a prospective client burdened by Relationship Friction. She interrupted me: “It wasn’t my fault.” Until then, she had been smiling. Her body language had been relaxed and open. I saw her visibly tense. […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom in the Age of AI? Here is why it matters now more than ever. The AI debate currently raging misses out on highlighting what AI cannot — in fact won’t be able to — do. And yet, what AI cannot do reveals our structural human advantage. Here is a quote I find particularly […]
Read MoreRelationship Wisdom isn’t as difficult as you think it is. Here is a small tutorial. I recently had a milestone birthday. That day, a saleswoman from a shop I frequent emailed me a birthday greeting. She mentioned my age in a way I found clumsy. Annoyed, I sent just a curt reply. To her credit, she sensed it: […]
Read MoreThe Israeli-Palestinian conflict is the epitome of Relationship Friction I hesitated to post about this: such a loaded and incredibly delicate topic. Let me make it clear: my intention with this post is NOT to make light of this war. My point is this: Relationship Friction is the root cause of conflict. It can take many forms. […]
Read MoreEmployers ask you to manage. You also need to be able to cope. The difference between the two is crucial. Many of my clients face excessive workloads. Incessant demands impossible to plan for. Ever-rising business volumes without the right processes. In response, they are expected to manage. Managing is both cognitive and behavioural. It demands […]
Read More“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself” – @Steve Maraboli, Speaker, Author, Athlete, Veteran Relationship friction also exists within. Develop your relationship wisdom by listening to another voice – the one of your authentic nature. It’s easy to point the finger at somebody else. At work, it’s bad bosses, […]
Read More“I’d like to punch him in the face”, Donald Trump, 22 February 2016 about a protester at one of his rallies Conflict surrounds us: armed struggles abroad, political attacks at home. We also know conflict in our personal lives – at home, in the schoolyard and at work. Here is a video about coping with […]
Read More“The thoughts in our minds are not facts.” This is a quote from Joseph Nguyen’s “Don’t Believe Everything You Think”. When I was studying psychology, I was asked to keep a thought diary and capture as many of my thoughts as possible. I discovered that our thoughts are both fleeting and largely conjectural. I remember […]
Read MoreHello and welcome to this month’s neuro blog! Let’s see: where have we got to? Three articles in, we know about the three parts of the human brain (read about the triune brain) and the dominance of the unconscious. We also know that one of the main purposes of the human brain is sense-making (read again about what the brain is for). […]
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