“The thoughts in our minds are not facts.”
This is a quote from Joseph Nguyen’s “Don’t Believe Everything You Think”.
When I was studying psychology, I was asked to keep a thought diary and capture as many of my thoughts as possible. I discovered that our thoughts are both fleeting and largely conjectural.
I remember using a red pen to cross out those thoughts which were not verifiable facts. Very few remained.
Let me gently encourage you to keep a thought diary for even just a few days. It’s a sobering and eye-opening exercise.
Years later, I had the chance to meet the Dai Lama at a retreat in upstate New York. He observed: “People live in what was. They also live in what might be. Mostly, they live in what isn’t.”
Our thoughts about the past are memories – some filled with regret.
Our thoughts about the future are hopes and dreams – or predictions.
With respect to the present, many of our thoughts focus on what we would prefer instead of what is.
It is widely accepted that our beliefs shape our reality. In fact, our thoughts shape us.
Have you heard the story of Harold, a curious four-year-old boy who creates his own world by using a magic purple crayon? This children’s book is a tribute to human creativity, but it also serves as a cautionary tale about the dangers of living in a world of our own making.
We become the sum of our perspectives on the world, the people in it and ourselves, based on the thoughts we have about our past experiences, our future aspirations and our present frustrations.
Said differently, we are the Architects of our own simulation. The Matrix is within.
We live in what psychology calls an “assumptive world” which can be quite far removed from factual reality. We live our assumptions as truths: to us, they ARE truths – not hypotheses to be tested.
I remember believing that working harder was the answer to my workplace challenges. Only after burning out did I realise this was just an assumption lived as truth. It took me two burnouts to confront then shed what I had unquestionably accepted as reality.
Do you know that experience of your assumptive world colliding with the real one?
What happened when a key assumption you lived as true was proven false by a harsh reality?
What assumptions lived as truths might be standing in the way of change for you? Let’s have a chat 👋
If someone you know is being held back from positive change by unhelpful beliefs, kindly share this with them 🙏
